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I have recently just returned from a wonderful 6 days “DEEP DIVE” retreat in Wales,with an incredible group of women, held by Jules Heavens, who works, amongst many things, with the Naked Voice (Chloe Goodchild) and poetry as a portal to awakening, transformation and healing as taught by Kim Rosen. It was an incredibly powerful week for me, not only to be in communion with so many beautiful women for such a long time, which is a very rare opportunity, but the depth that we went to.

The focus of the retreat was something called a Mysterium, which I have also done with Kim Rosen this year.

For 3 days we went into a non-verbal space, without any knowledge of time but the position of the sun and slept in “nests” in one room together. We sang, we wrote, we spoke poetry, we danced to music, we ate, but beyond that we just journeyed with ourselves. It was the most beautiful feminine space and as deep as any “silent” retreat I have done, or possibly, for me, even deeper. What struck me the most was the lack of time. It feels extraordinary how we, (and I really mean me, but I am sure I am not alone) are so governed by time. There always is something to do and somewhere to be. Even on most meditation or yoga retreats, you are responsible for turning up in a certain place at a certain time.  I always know what time it is, and very rarely let time just disappear for a moment. The only place that happens for me is on my allotment when I leave my clocks and phone behind and just dive into the vegetables and earth for as long as I feel to.

I am often struck by how crazy our lives are in this time and the huge stress we are under just to behave “normally”. Working set hours in set ways, not resting when we need to, striving towards achieving all the time. Having to earn money just to pay bills so we can stay warm, feed ourselves and have light and all the other things that we think or feel we need. I often long for the distant history when we lived more naturally in rhythm with the earth and our own cycles. But the reality is we do not, and with that time there were also great hardships. But in fact for us now, life is speeding up. It is why, to me, it feels increasingly important that we all take time to “Retreat”, whatever that means to us. Where we take time completely out of our normal lives and journey inwards, to reconnect, rejuvenate and connect to our own heart spaces.

During my time on retreat I wrote a lot, which a new thing for me. Journaling has never been a strong point, but that and my love for poetry is changing and I am beginning to write a whole lot more, hence the beginning of these “Ramblings”

Here is a poem I wrote about Time.


And in came Time Measuring, managing, governing our every action And in that moment we forgot to listen

To listen to the blades of grass rustling in the wind

To listen to the earth’s heart beat, to it’s steady solid rhythm,

Or to the wind calling us to come home

It’s time, just for a moment, to put down Time, our clocks, our watches, our mobile phones

And instead to stop, to breath, to listen

All the worlds live in that moment

When the starling takes flight and our hearts begin to sing.

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